Mommyfail? [Guest Post]

Today I had a perfect example of “Mommyfail.” I received an email from the school psychologist, reminding me that I was late completing and returning a parent-assessment form for an evaluation for my son.


Why? I yelled at myself. How could I forget to send it back? 


Inside my head a Jack Nicholson-like voice let me have it. How could you be so stupid?! How could you not put your child ahead of your other eighty-million things you have going on every day?  This is his education for #&@)’s sake! You stayed up until midnight last night working on your resume, how could you not have squeezed in five minutes to complete and return the $^&@ form?


And, so, I pulled out the nearly-completed the form. My husband and I scheduled a date-night last week, just to sit down and work on it. We thought of examples that proved our thoughts, we shared laughs and frustrations about his eight and a half years. The form was near completion.

89/365Not the actual file.

But it wasn’t complete. The teacher in me wanted more. Sure, I knew all the “right” things to say. I knew just what trigger words to use in an analysis that likely partake in tipping the scales of evaluation. So, I sat down, pulled up sample  comments that I’d saved from writing countless report cards in years past, Bloom’s Taxonomy and other evaluation and teaching tools to make sure I was making the “right” comments.


That’s when Jack Nicholson came back to me. “You want the truth? You want the truth?! YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH.”


I couldn’t. As I completed the paperwork, I realized the truth as my muscles tensed and my fingers cramped. I didn’t want to fail my child.

I was terrified of sending back this form. Terrified that I wouldn’t represent him right. That I might have missed an example that would prove his need for service. That I had forgotten to include a key verb, adjective or noun. That, perhaps, that one thing missing from my form would make it so that he wouldn’t qualify for services.


Of course, we all know that’s nonsense. There are multiple factors that go into play in any evaluation for services in schools. Testing, feedback from teachers, staff and therapists, even the child can help evaluate himself. But as a parent? Who’s sole interest in this case is making sure he qualifies… that’s a lot of weight on my shoulders.


I completed and returned the form and my imaginary Mr. Nicholson patted me on the back. Was it enough? I wondered. “You did good.”


And now, we’ll just wait and see.


About the author:

Julie Meyers Pron blogs at Just Precious, your go-to destination for parents featuring snappy blog posts and lively Vlogs that will help any visitor navigate educational issues and parenting questions while offering helpful child development tips. Created by a licenced teacher and experienced mom and marketer, Julie Meyers Pron features discussion topics that moms value including organization, menu planning and fun, realistic, real-life stories. While you’re visiting Just Precious be sure to check out the eye catching Mom-lifestyle suggestions that will allow you to parent confidently while remaining your stylish self.

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